Our infrequent guest arts and culture blogger, Jeffanan Argle, has decided that there has been too much frivolous content on this channel recently. To correct that oversight (His words) here is a small piece that he believed you should all read about the difficulty of the human condition through these troubled times.

We have all been living through troubled times, I can barely face ploughing through the line of the masked impoverished outside the local ‘Little’ Waitrose to get my essentials. It’s like a scene from a black and white movie that you won’t have seen, so the reference would be wasted on you.

Breathing the same air as these people seems almost to strip me of what makes me different, special. A weight hangs upon me that they simply could not understand with their poor education, and ‘jobs’.

In an attempt to address the current culture divide, and as a way of applying soothing oils onto the bubbling waters of the world I present to you one of my infrequent poems. Now I must request that you do not just rush to the end and simply read the poem, I feel it is important that you wade through several paragraphs of prose explaining the motivations for me creating this, dare I say, a masterpiece?

It seems that I cannot say that according to the editor of this website, what does she know? She got a media studies degree from one of those universities that used to be a sixth form college out in the North somewhere. Terrible place. I imagine.

Perhaps there is a simplicity, brevity even, in letting you scan the words with your eyes unfettered by learning and the many years of expectation of your pushy parents. The resultant accusations based on the fact that I was not a talented musician even though, as Mother put it ‘We paid bloody thousands to teach you piano, and you can barely make a noise out of it.’

Mother never understood my love of surrealist and abstract music, or indeed me.

So here, in its entirety, and with no further explanation is my latest work. Gaze upon it with an open mind and a closed mouth. Seriously, breathe with your mouth closed, have you learnt nothing about transmitting diseases you horrible pleb?

It is simply entitled ‘Beanbag’

Brian Bilston? Move over there is a new internet poet in town.